The Coopsters @thecoopsters@angrytoday.com

SexBot, Inc. Blames Failing Business On Society's Unattainable Standards Of Beauty

Horologist Not The Job You Hoped

...It's Not Funny CMC Research Division, Akorn Pharmaceutical Suffers Chronic Hernias (aka Busted Guts)

CMC Research Division Giggles Every Time An Order Is Placed

"Why did you kill Gabi?"

"Cause she just wouldn't shut up about whatever stupid nonsense thoughts she had runnin' through her pathetic little girly brain."

"Fuckin' bitches... Sounds like a clear case of self-defense. You're free to go Mr. Laundrie."

Tech Startup With No Funding, No Employees, And No Customers Banned From AWS, Google Play Store, And Apple Store For Violating Terms Of Service

Redneck Certain That If He Can't Make Rent This Month, He'll Be Forced To Fuck His Sister

"Lord Coopsters, how do you, who is filled with evil, dwell in nirvana?"

"Oh silly retarded Srivananašasaīswanasäsavana, I am filled with nothing, simply radiating the world back upon itself, forever laughing at fools like you who are unable to find peace in hell."

China Resolves Evergrande Debt Crisis By Printing US Dollars

Reservation Upset Fly Like Wind Would Play 'Sun Moon Heaven' In A Key Other Than Bird 'O Father

A Hoard Of Frustrated Unemployed Viruses Gang Raped Three Young Bacteria In The Colon District Yesterday Evening

Man Tired Of Trying, Simply Going To Wait For The Second Coming Of Christ

The Internet Archive's Wayback Machine Now Tracks The Internet Archive's Wayback Machine

"Birches ain't shit but stumps and twigs."